My Not So Perfect But Fabulous Life

using my big words to inspire… & hopefully make a difference

It’s Been a While… November 12, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — MDunbar @ 7:50 pm

I started blogging in January and was consistent for about a month. So much for good habits only take 27 days. I have so many things that have come up since January. Sean has settled into a new job. I lost my dad in April. LD is in High School now. Wow. RIght now I am breathing. Trying to slow down and focus which I think is what started this blog for me anyway.

I allowed things that are unimportant to fill my life. Extra projects that don’t inspire me like they should. I have been saying yes far too often which is a huge weakness for me. Things are getting better though and will continue to do so as long as I can maintain my focus. So here goes! More of My Not So Perfect But Fabulous Life!

 

Snow & Ice January 30, 2010

Filed under: Friends,Joy,Kids,Rest — MDunbar @ 11:18 am

All by herself!

 

Big Brother giving sis a ride

Making the trek up the street

 

LD & KD

 

Fancy Footwork!

 

Taking time out to indulge mom.

 

Showing off!

 

Taking a tumble

 

 

Cinnamon Coffee Cake January 29, 2010

Filed under: Food,Joy — MDunbar @ 4:44 pm

Excellent Cinnamon Coffee Cake!

 

 
1 cup sour cream
3/4 cup butter
1 1/2 cups white sugar
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 cup chopped walnuts
1 teaspoon baking soda
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 eggs
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
1/4 cup white sugar
 
 
Directions:
1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (205 degrees C). Lightly grease one 10 inch bundt pan.
2. Cream 1 1/2 cups white sugar together with eggs until well blended. Add sour cream and butter or margarine and beat well. Add flour, baking soda, and baking powder and mix well. Stir in vanilla and the chopped nuts.
3. Mix the remaining 1/4 cup of white sugar with the cinnamon.
4. Pour half of the batter into the prepared pan. Sprinkle generously with the cinnamon sugar mixture. Cover with remaining cake batter.
5. Bake at 400 degrees F (205 degrees C) for 8 minutes. Lower heat to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) and bake for an additional 40 minutes
 

Fun Photo Friday! Icy Day!

Filed under: Joy,Kids,Rest,Unplug — MDunbar @ 4:21 pm

The older kids head to the park!

 

 

Snow Angels!

 

 

These girls are a triple threat! (KD in middle)

 

 

KD making another run!

 

 

If the real sled won't work, there is always ghetto sledding!

 

 

Hubs gets into the action.

 

 

Guidance January 28, 2010

Filed under: Friends,Hope,letting go,parenthood,Uncategorized — MDunbar @ 4:05 pm

A helping hand to guide us makes all the difference!

 

I never knew how difficult life would be at times. My parents have been together for almost 50 years. I watched them interact, dad the provider, mom the disciplinarian. They had their arguments (they were the parents that silently argued. If the house was quiet,  there was trouble.) but for the most part, everything seemed easy. My Dad made a great living and none of us wanted for anything.  

I had no idea that they were shielding us from the stress and at times frustration that is parenting!  I have worked very hard to let go of worrying but it still creeps up on me. I have said it before, my girlfriends keep me grounded and somewhat sane. Something that Sean and I didn’ t have was someone to help guide us. Someone who had been there before to give us advice. By the time I was married my parents had issues with health problems and Sean’s mother passed away a few months before we met. None of our parents explained budgets, parenting during difficult times or how to get through the tough places on our own marriage.  

We have since made friends that are older and wiser than we are. Experience is the best teacher and if someone has been where you are, let them tell you what they did, whether they failed or not, so that you can learn from that. There have been many instances in my life where the person taught me exactly what not to do but I remembered what they went through, or the pain they caused those around them, and I knew that I didn’t want to cause that kind of pain. We need people in our lives to help guide us. Whether it is a pastor at your church, a teacher at your school or a friend that has been around the block, so to speak. It is important to know that no matter what, we aren’t alone. We aren’t the first to experience life and we won’t be the last. It is just comforting to know that no matter what life gives us, we can depend on those around us to help us through the tough times.  

Who in your life helps to guide you? Who is your go-to person that is always there for you?  

SOmething I always thought was a beautiful concept was this: The word Guidance means we are guided by something. I feel that God guides me and in that we are in a realtionship together.  

Guidance = God U and I DANCE!

 

Guidance means God U and I DANCE!

 

The Jones’ January 27, 2010

Filed under: Being Positive,Faith,Friends,Hope,On being a mom,Unplug — MDunbar @ 7:57 pm

What's on your list?

” We are a tribe of dogmatic individuals who strive 24-7 to have it all but as a society, we don’t know when to throw in the towel.” Ellen Miller

How many times have you found yourself fighting for something that you know you can’t win. Maybe you held on to a project that was in no way going to come to fruition or maybe you tried with all your heart to make others care about something that you were passionate about but to no avail.

We drive ourselves and work very hard. Success, by society standards, is how much money/status/material possessions that you have. I know this as well as the next person. Starting off in advertising sales and working for a society magazine, I was caught up in what I thought was important. After a mission trip to Mexico, I remembered who I was and what was really important. I started to see the things that surrounded me were not at all in line with what was really important to me. People were lying, cheating, stealing. They were miserable people who, from the outside, seemed to have everything. I was a part of that all the while feeling like something was missing.

After returning from the mission trip, I quit sales altogether and had no job in sight. I only knew I had to get out of the environment I was in. Two weeks to the day I received a call from a friend at the church we attended and there was a position that seemed to have been created encompassing everything I had ever done. I truly felt it was God showing me that I had to trust in him and everything would work out. Why was I so surprised and overwhelmed? Growing up my mom always said that if I followed “God’s instruction manual for life” that things would work out like they should.

Well, God knows I am not perfect but I do know what is important to me. I am working very hard to not let the materialistic things get in the way of what is important. It is an everyday challenge to focus on my life and his plan and let go of the consumer in me. Sometimes I fall prey to “The Jones”. They seem to have everything, right? THe surprising thing is, once inside THe Jones’ house, they don’ have it figured out either.

Bottom line is, I know what is important to me. I am focused on being a good person. I am trying to be the kind of wife, mom, daughter, friend that I would want. Do I fall short? Every single day. I am told though, “The key is not to prioritize what’s on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities.” My schedule is full of my faith, my family and my friends.

If you looked at your schedule, what ranks highest? Like it or not, it tells you exactly what you think is important.

 

Authentic

Filed under: Being Positive,Friends,husbands,Uncategorized — MDunbar @ 7:16 pm

The only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well. Joe Ancis

Like it or not, I have pretty much been who I am all of my life. I am the cheesy, blue skies, silver lining kind of girl. I love giving back and helping others achieve something of importance and I truly love people. These things come easily to me but often my feelings get hurt because I get too emotionally vested or someone is just mean. I don’t understand why there are women out there who thrive on talking down or making others feel bad. I guess that is why growing up, I always had more guy friends. My husband is my best friend. He knows me so well and accepts me for the crazy person I am.

I am also incredibly blessed to have some really close girlfriends that I can’t even tell you how important they are to me. The commonality that we have is we are all strong-willed, honest folks. None of us pretend to be anything we are not, for better or for worse. It is so freeing to live this way. We are authentic, and can be completely crazy at times, but no matter what, we are honest and supportive of one another. I owe so much to these special women. I don’t know where I would be without them.

This part of the book is about living intentionally. Miller says there are three things to help us get back to who we really are. Our authentic selves.

  1. Reveal: a part of us to others. Let others know that we aren’t perfect.
  2. Respond: Listen with our hearts and respond with actions.
  3. Relax: Get comfortable. Let down the barriers that prevent us from being real.

I can tell you that even though some are put off by the fact that I have no pretenses and am totally honest about who I am, I would rather live with who I am and know that person, than lose myself in a persona that wasn’t real. One of my favorite characters is Elle Woods from Legally Blond. She is very “Malibu Barbie” but she knows who she is, she is genuinely nice to everyone, and she is truly authentic. The confidence in who she is makes her so likable and her attitude in infectious. Even those who ridicule her come to love her for her supportive, friendly ways.

“Believing in yourself never goes out of style.” Elle Woods

Life is too short and I want to be present in ever aspect. C.S. Lewis said it best, “We are what we believe we are.”

Who are you?